Do I Really Need a Prenup?

Prenup

When most of us think of prenups, we probably think of wealthy tycoons or Hollywood stars who are marrying partners much younger and less financially stable than they are.  In the real world, however, there are several reasons why a prenup (aka “premarital agreement”) might be right for you and your future spouse.

Make Your Own Rules

North Carolina couples who plan to marry have two options: (1) marry without a premarital agreement and accept all of the legal consequences of our state’s family, estate, and trust laws; or (2) enter a premarital agreement before marriage that will enable the couple to choose whether and how certain family, estate, and trust laws will apply to them.  Essentially, if you get married without a premarital agreement, you are allowing the state to write your agreement for you — the legislature’s pronouncements on family law, estate law, and trust law (and their amendment and repeal over time) will guide the court in the event you divorce.  You might think of this akin to dying without a will — someone else will make the rules about what happens to your family and property.

A valid, carefully crafted premarital agreement, on the other hand, allows you and your betrothed to choose the approach that will work best for you if you ever separate.  As a couple, you know your unique circumstances better than anyone else, and you may benefit from rejecting the one-size-fits-all approach of the state statutes.  Instead, you have an opportunity to determine your own path in the event that things go south.

Address “Business” Issues Before Walking Down the Aisle

There’s no point in denying it:  negotiating a premarital agreement is not the most romantic part of wedding planning.  While the most important, inspiring aspects of a wedding are about love and commitment, the unavoidable truth is that marriage is also a business decision.  That’s true whether you enter a premarital agreement or not.  In the event that you and your future spouse divorce, your property will be divided as if you two had a business partnership.  Business people make contracts to govern the division of money and property all the time, so it’s not absurd to think that you should too.

Although it can be difficult to buckle down and discuss finances when you’re in the haze of wedding planning, before the wedding is actually an ideal time to work through these issues.  You’re not clouded by hurt and anger the way many are when they are faced with the business aspects of separating.  You can work together on realistic solutions that will work for both of you if you ever separate.  Plus, even the most open, in sync couples can benefit from going over their finances and getting everything out in the open before committing their lives to each other.  For many, it can be very freeing to feel legally and financially secure before the wedding.  A premarital agreement can ideally help couples minimize financial stress so they can focus on their relationship.

But How Do I Know If I Should Get a Prenup?

With a few exceptions, most couples can benefit from having a premarital agreement.  They’re not just for reality starlets and real estate moguls; anyone who has property or debt, owns a business, has a professional license, has children from another relationship, or has a significantly higher or lower income than their partner should think about getting a prenup.  Retirement savings, valuable collections, and business assets are just a few of the things that can be addressed and protected in a premarital agreement.  Whatever the financial circumstances of you and your future spouse, chances are that you have assets or debts that you would prefer to make your own decisions about together, rather than leaving the decision up to the complex and changing laws of the state.  If you are interested in discussing a premarital agreement, please contact me to schedule an appointment.

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